The following article is one of a series of accounts from students who recently returned from Arizona. They were part of a delegation that spent a week touring the state amid the enactment of controversial law SB 1070. The Center for New Community, a national civil rights organization based in Chicago, sponsored the trip, which included nine students from Washington D.C., New York, Chicago and Colorado.
By Efrain Ramirez
I never thought that I had enough water in me to be able to cry everyday. It really felt like I was mourning the death of someone. This trip to Arizona hasn’t been an educational experience; it’s been an emotional rollercoaster that took a heavy toll on me. It was one of the hardest experiences of my life. This trip really started years before, even before I was born.
My mom is an undocumented immigrant from Mexico. She crossed the border 20 years ago. Before that, she had a baby girl who died a few days after birth and from that point my mom knew she didn’t want to have any children in Mexico. She wanted a better future for children – children who hadn’t been conceived yet. She has crossed the border three times in her life. The last time she crossed was in 2001. We went to Mexico to see her family for the first time in 10 years and since then she hadn’t seen her family until two months ago via Skype.
This trip has reinforced what I have learned from my mom and from Spanish new media. I wanted a firsthand experience; I didn’t want to hear any more stories. However, this trip has hit me in my heart. From the meeting with Isabel Garcia and hearing about deaths at the border really moved me. I knew about the deaths but seeing those crosses, some of them saying ‘Desconocido,’ it really struck me.
After that, heading to the border and seeing the environment that my mom went through, that moment struck me. My mom had to endure this. It gave me a greater sense of appreciation for her sacrifice, what she had to do to cross that border just to give me a better life. This appreciation was reinforced when we went to meet with undocumented residents. To hear all the stories of different people and what they have gone through, really made me think of my mom. I saw my mom’s story.
I spoke to them and talked about my mom’s experience and what she did. I told the people I met that they shouldn’t regret coming to this country despite the hatred. I said, ‘one day, when your children grow up, they will tell you thank you, thank you for your sacrifice and your hard work. Keep fighting for your children cause they will be grateful and to cherish every moment with them. Don’t regret your decision and thank you for what you did for your children.’
I wanted to give them a little support because I felt this is all I could do at the moment.
When I was at the Florence Detention Center, I couldn’t look at the people being detained. I couldn’t because I didn’t want the people to view me as a person who came to look at them as if it was a zoo. They were looking at me because they knew I was Latino and they were talking about me. I just didn’t want to stand there and see them; I wanted to set them free, free from that hypocritical, tyrannical prison.
This trip was hard on me. After the first day, I started to regret coming on the trip. I just wanted to run back home. This feeling kept following me. I just wanted to go back home and tell my mom, ‘thank you for everything, your sacrifice was worth it.’
Photo: Immigrant Rights Protest at the Broadview Detention Center in Illinois. Credit Carrie Sloan via Flickr.